Matteo Lane with Desus & Mero. HILARIOUS!!!
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 1 | July 21, 2017 10:25 PM |
Who was it that thought he was funny?
by Anonymous | reply 2 | July 21, 2017 10:39 PM |
Yeah... I found this guy's Instagram two or three years ago and was into the mustache. I saw some of his stand up on YouTube and mainly remember him singing, though he was funny enough. I'm surprised to see him on Colbert to be honest. Didn't think his career was going anywhere.
I'm just gonna post some pics from his IG:
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 3 | July 21, 2017 10:48 PM |
Also a solid illustrator.
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 10 | July 21, 2017 10:49 PM |
I want to see Desus & Mero spit roast Matteo! That would be HOT!
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 12 | July 21, 2017 10:52 PM |
What a tiny little waist. 24? 26"?
I don't think that Italian eats any pasta.
by Anonymous | reply 13 | July 21, 2017 11:29 PM |
He's actually pretty funny. I wonder if he's performed on any Atlantis cruises.
by Anonymous | reply 14 | July 21, 2017 11:54 PM |
I thought he was shorter. But, he looks ~ 5'10" next to Max who is listed at 6'0"".
by Anonymous | reply 15 | July 21, 2017 11:56 PM |
I would ignore the fun femme and fuck him. My erect cock and that stache would go well together.
by Anonymous | reply 16 | July 22, 2017 12:11 AM |
R16, I bet he's a power bottom! Yum!
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 17 | July 22, 2017 12:13 AM |
That ass needs to be fucked real hard!
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 18 | July 22, 2017 12:15 AM |
He's cute, apart from that haircut, which looks good on nobody.
Max's bf is the most handsome guy on the thread.
by Anonymous | reply 19 | July 22, 2017 12:15 AM |
Who wouldn't wanna fuck that tight little bod?
by Anonymous | reply 20 | July 22, 2017 12:16 AM |
Now that I think about it, I feel like I might've had a group thing with this guy a couple of years ago. Don't think he was rocking the stache then, though.
by Anonymous | reply 21 | July 22, 2017 12:16 AM |
Facially, he reminds me of the younger half of the Maverick Men. Similar sharpish nose.
by Anonymous | reply 22 | July 22, 2017 12:17 AM |
He should bring more singing into his act; it would be more original than gay jokes.
"The Barber of Sayville" "The (Cock) Ring Cycle."
But who would bother to have a relationship when he's showing his ass off so often on Instagram?
by Anonymous | reply 25 | July 22, 2017 12:20 AM |
Times has changed. People like to see the goods upfront. YMMV.
Instagram seems to havee usurped even gay apps. I don't want one because it seems hard to not to come off as tacky or boring, but I'm sure it's a great tool to get laid.
by Anonymous | reply 26 | July 22, 2017 12:27 AM |
r14 throws Paris Is Burning-quality shade.
by Anonymous | reply 27 | July 22, 2017 2:05 AM |
Saw this in the Sean Spicer Thread.
Kyle Griffin = Matteo Lane?
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 28 | July 22, 2017 3:18 AM |
He's attractive in those Instagram pics... when he's not moving or speaking.
My god being around him must be exhausting.
by Anonymous | reply 30 | July 22, 2017 6:04 AM |
Am I being harsh in calling this a bit of a minstrel act?
by Anonymous | reply 31 | July 22, 2017 7:15 AM |
I would rather fuck him then listen to his embarrassing stand-up.
by Anonymous | reply 32 | July 22, 2017 11:18 AM |
That stand-up act is terrible. Maybe good enough for open mic night on a gay cruise but not even close to late night network TV standards. Colbert's booking director must have owed him a favor.
by Anonymous | reply 33 | July 22, 2017 11:26 AM |
I think Colbert is a deeply closeted person. But not so deeply that it doesn't bubble up frequently in things he says or body language.
by Anonymous | reply 34 | July 22, 2017 11:35 AM |
R28 That's trippy. They look so alike. They must be made aware of each other.
by Anonymous | reply 35 | July 22, 2017 1:26 PM |
He needs to stop with the canned smirk. It's like reverse duckface.
by Anonymous | reply 37 | December 19, 2017 5:21 AM |
He needs to work on his act as much as he works on his body.
by Anonymous | reply 38 | December 19, 2017 6:43 AM |
r28, I seriously thought that's who this thread was about and was confused because I had thought he was a reporter not a comic and decided he must just have a very political and current events focused twitter acct.
Can we get them in the same room together to prove they both exist?
by Anonymous | reply 39 | December 19, 2017 7:26 AM |
[quote]Don't know @MatteoLane but have been compared to him so many times that I'm concerned we're actually the same person.
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 40 | December 19, 2017 7:33 AM |
I've seen this guy's schtick before
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 41 | December 19, 2017 7:38 AM |
"And what's the deal with those TV dinners? Amirite??"
Is the pharmacy joke part of a starter comedian kit? I've heard it many times.
He's cute, and has a great body though! I'm sure lots of people tell him he's hilarious.
I'd like to see him and Kyle having a torrid affair. Mateo would greet him by saying "Kyle! I mustache you a question!" After which hot sex would ensue.
by Anonymous | reply 42 | December 19, 2017 7:56 AM |
Countdown until he does porn.
by Anonymous | reply 43 | December 19, 2017 8:14 AM |
He's attractive UNTIL you get to his Instagram....as usual.
by Anonymous | reply 44 | December 19, 2017 12:55 PM |
Was he assigned female at birth?
by Anonymous | reply 45 | December 19, 2017 1:18 PM |
Matteo is clearly the OP.
by Anonymous | reply 46 | December 19, 2017 4:13 PM |
His brother is hotter and also gay.
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 47 | December 19, 2017 4:15 PM |
His brother's married too
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 48 | December 19, 2017 4:17 PM |
He recently got fucked by a Magic Mike Vegas dancer.
I like his podcast. It's breezy and doesn't aspire to any great profundity or expertise. I find his co-host fascinating.
by Anonymous | reply 50 | December 20, 2017 1:02 AM |
[quote]He recently got fucked by a Magic Mike Vegas dancer.
Which one? (scroll)
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 51 | December 20, 2017 1:05 AM |
Was it Sebastian Gonzalez? He's the only cast member that I can see who Matteo is following
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 53 | December 20, 2017 1:15 AM |
I'm doubt he even bothered to get the guys name R53.
by Anonymous | reply 54 | December 20, 2017 1:20 AM |
He didn't say, but from looking at the show IG, there's black guy who has a boyfriend (and a twin!).
by Anonymous | reply 55 | December 20, 2017 1:21 AM |
It's called Inside the Closet.
by Anonymous | reply 56 | December 20, 2017 1:23 AM |
Perhaps. I don't have IG so I couldn't look at who Matteo follows.
by Anonymous | reply 57 | December 20, 2017 1:24 AM |
This is the guy I thought it might be. I only gave a cursory look to a few of the other dancers' IGs so guy in bed with other guy stood out.
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 58 | December 20, 2017 1:28 AM |
"Dancer" pretty much means whore right?
by Anonymous | reply 60 | December 20, 2017 1:42 AM |
This one (foreground) is/was a Mariah dancer (orderly?). He was the one chosen to give a personal dance to an audience member on Ellen. Apart from one cookie smelling pic from a Pleasantville style ad, and a cocked hip pose beside James Corden, his IG doesn't ping at all. :(
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 61 | December 20, 2017 2:29 AM |
With that mustache, I'd like to fuck his mouth like a hairy pussy.
by Anonymous | reply 63 | January 22, 2018 3:45 PM |
The closed-captioning typist was Dan Quayle.
by Anonymous | reply 64 | January 22, 2018 3:58 PM |
What kind of a name is Matteo? Does he think he's Felix the Cat?
by Anonymous | reply 66 | January 22, 2018 5:00 PM |
We’re disgusting. But I love @itsevanwilliams
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 67 | January 22, 2018 5:05 PM |
His ex worked in the Obama administration and travelled over the world with them. The ex is married to a much older man...
Detectives La Toya, who is the ex?
by Anonymous | reply 68 | April 18, 2018 1:00 AM |
Ugh. These two are so hot together. And separately.
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 69 | May 8, 2018 5:40 PM |
Matteo's gotten much bigger since I found out about him. Should he work on his triceps?
by Anonymous | reply 71 | May 8, 2018 6:28 PM |
They look pretty good to me. Of course I like bigger, but his muscle size is great for his frame.
But... I wouldn't mind seeing him huge
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 72 | May 8, 2018 6:41 PM |
Who's his ex in the political scene?
by Anonymous | reply 73 | July 27, 2018 7:22 PM |
His current boyfriend's name is Kike? How unfortunate.
by Anonymous | reply 74 | July 27, 2018 7:24 PM |
He lost me with the gay wave.
by Anonymous | reply 75 | July 27, 2018 7:29 PM |
Like someone else said upthread, his Instagram just showcases exhausting narcissism. And the "trademark smirk" reminds me of Andy Cohen's open mouth smile, which just reeks of artifice. Also, his stand-up isn't funny.
by Anonymous | reply 76 | July 27, 2018 7:37 PM |
like like like like like like like
by Anonymous | reply 77 | July 27, 2018 7:37 PM |
Jesus I made it through 3 seconds without stopping it. Can't stand the over-the-top - SOOOO I'M GAYYYYY LIKE JUST WANTED TO LIKE WAVE AND LIKE SHAKE AND MAKE SURE YOU LIKE KNEEEEEEEW.
by Anonymous | reply 78 | July 27, 2018 7:40 PM |
Take away the abs and what's left?
by Anonymous | reply 79 | July 27, 2018 7:48 PM |
The self-loathing in this thread is off the charts.
by Anonymous | reply 81 | July 27, 2018 10:12 PM |
I would so like to put my dick up Matteo's butt.
by Anonymous | reply 82 | July 27, 2018 11:04 PM |
R81 what part is self loathing? If you hate someone who's hideously annoying, the way to describe it is self loathing? That's just stupid. I actually like and love myself a lot. I just don't like over-the-top annoying people - gay or straight.
by Anonymous | reply 83 | July 29, 2018 2:30 AM |
He really won me over with his cuteness in his comedy routines.
I agree his Instagrams are off putting. His constant routine is to show off as much skin as possible and to mug goofily and outrageously (as if that mitigates his whoriness). But I do like his comedy.
by Anonymous | reply 84 | July 29, 2018 2:51 AM |
Every Disney Character is gay
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 85 | February 20, 2019 6:44 AM |
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